One Whom I Love

 

It was late in the night and Sonia was tossing in bed, unable to sleep. She had been feeling unusually lonely for a few days. No matter how hard she tried, love seemed to elude her. She picked up her phone and scrolled through social media. 

“When am I going to find the one whom I love?” she questioned herself, looking at all the happy couples on Facebook and Instagram. 

The more she scrolled, the more depressed she felt and she couldn’t escape the clutches of the demon called self-doubt.

 

The next day she was still feeling low and her colleague noticed that.

“Are you okay Sonia?” asked Natasha.

“Not really.”

“What is it? You can tell me.”

Sonia went on to explain her predicament.

“Oh, I can completely understand darling,” replied Natasha. “I may have a solution, but I don’t know if you would accept it.”

“Try me!” she exclaimed.

“Well, there’s this sage who dwells in a cave on the foot of mount Sahyadri. They say he has helped many find love in life. I have been wanting to go there since a long time myself. Would you be interested in going?”

“You know I don’t believe in all the baba stuff,” said Sonia.

“Oh, don’t get me wrong,” replied Natasha. “He’s not going to make you do prayers or make you tie threads or make you fast. They say he’s wise and his wisdom has helped people immeasurably.”

“Let’s go on Saturday then.”

“Done!” replied Natasha.

 

They set out early on Saturday and reached the cave just before the break of dawn. The sage had just come out of meditation and was standing with folded hands facing the rising sun. Once the sun was completely out, he turned to the women, “What brings you here?” 

“My friend here is feeling lost looking for love, we have heard you can help,” replied Natasha.

“You don’t look like a baba?” remarked Sonia, perplexed.

“Why? Were you expecting someone with a big beard and half naked body?” grinned the clean-shaven sage wearing a comfortable t-shirt and track pants.

“No, I mean yes, I mean, I don’t know,” replied Sonia.

“Don’t go by the looks. Not everyone who looks learned is learned and not everyone who looks ignorant is ignorant. Looks can be deceptive, one can easily wear a mask and misguide. Now, you come here in search of love?”

“Yes,” replied Sonia. “I have failed to find love, I think I’m just not good enough, such a loser I am.”

 

“Well, are you ready to toil to find the one whom you love?” asked the sage.

“Yes, I am ready.”

“Then we need to climb this mountain. It’s a gruelling uphill climb. Will you be able to do it?”

“Yes, Natasha you in?”

“Yes, let’s do it,” she replied.

“Very well then, let’s get going.”

So, the three of them started climbing up the steep slopes.

“They say you have found the one whom you love, can you tell us how it feels?” asked Sonia.

“Oh, it feels great. Since I found the one I love, I believe love resides in my heart. In fact, I would say love is me and I am love!”

“Wow! That feels so good to hear. But how am I going to find love on top of this mountain? It looks deserted!”

“Have faith and patience young lady. Sometimes, holding on to faith is all you can do and patience is your greatest virtue in such times,” said the sage.

They continued on their journey.

 

A couple of hours later, they reached the top of the mountain and it looked as if they were in paradise. A pool of turquoise blue water surrounded by majestic green trees and lush green meadows.

“Wow!” the women said together. 

“This looks like heaven!” exclaimed Sonia.

The sage smiled, “it is, if you believe it is! You may rest for a while now.”

They sat down on the cool green grass, sipped on some water and ate some snacks that they had carried.

“Come with me now,” said the sage after fifteen minutes. The women got up and walked with him. He led them to the pool. He stood at the edge and looked into the pool.

“Come, come and stand beside me,” he instructed.

They did as he told them to do.

“Now look into the pool, do you see the one whom you love?”

 

“I see only my reflection,” said Sonia, a little disappointed.

“I see my reflection too,” replied sage. “And that’s the one whom I love. The one you see in the pool is the one you need to start loving.”

“I need to love myself?” asked Sonia, a little confused.

“Yes, you do. If you don’t love yourself, how are you going to love anyone or anything else? Forget anyone else, how are you going to appreciate life if you don’t love yourself?” asked the sage rhetorically. “It all begins with loving yourself. When you start loving yourself, your self-esteem will get a boost. You will conduct yourself better. You will be kind and polite and you will become a magnet for love. Since the time you came to me, you have only spoken ill about yourself. Don’t do that. Love yourself.”

“I think it makes some sense to me,” replied Sonia.

“Yeah, it does, a little,” reaffirmed Natasha.

“Don’t try to figure it all out together. You just need to know the next step, not the entire route. The route will be revealed to you as you move ahead. And one more thing, don’t go around looking for love.”

“Why not?” Enquired Sonia.

“Because love cannot be found outside, it grows, it grows in your heart when the conditions are right. Then you will have to nurture it with the right thoughts and attitude. Then, you too will become love and love will become you,” said the sage with a smile.

“Thank you, oh revered sage,” said Sonia with folded hands.

“Indeed, thank you so much,” said Natasha. “I’m glad we came here; we came with questions and we are leaving with directions to find the answers. But can I ask you a question?”

“Yes, surely.”

“Why bring us all the way up here? I mean, you could have explained this at the foot of the mountain too!”

The sage smiled and said, “Let’s just say it’s a test. I wanted to see how eager you are to find the answers to your questions.”

“What if we would have turned back?”

“Then it would mean you are not ready to seek, because this search is a continuous uphill journey, beyond this mountain. Does that address your concern?”

“Yes, it does,” replied Natasha and they continued on their way back.